This is normally a post I’d save for a Thursday (or, heck, not even write) but since it’s been rolling around in my brain, and yesterday consisted of unicorn drama, maybe now is a good time to get it out here.
“So, what do you have planned for your week?” a coworker asked me on a Tuesday.
“Well, tonight I have run club, and then Wednesday I have barre, Thursday I’m getting a massage, Friday I’m going to bed early, and I’ll be at barre training all weekend,” I replied.
“When do you have time to date?”
Cue me laughing my butt off.
“Date? Like, for real? Have you seen the people on dating websites?!” (she hasn’t because she’s in her fifties and is very happily married).
“I don’t know if I want to give up my me time in order to go for an awkward drink with someone.” I then scoffed.
“But wouldn’t you want to give that up for the right person?”
“Oh, absolutely. It’s just…..getting there isn’t easy and I have my routine doing things that are important to me. If the right person came along, I’d love to be in a relationship, but the whole casual dating/Tinder thing just doesn’t appeal to me.”
She’s been married for over thirty years.
I was married for seven and have been single for four and a half.
In there I’ve gone on one super awkward date and have had one guy bail last-minute on a date and then never bothered to reschedule. It feels like anyone on a dating site (I’ve tried Bumble, Match, OKCupid, and Tinder (but am currently on none of them)) doesn’t actually want to date. They want to chat with you, make vague references at maybe meeting up, but never actually commit, or when they find out I’m not looking for a hook up they flake. For real. I’m certainly not proposing marriage, but can’t there be something that exists between casual sex (sorry mom, should have warned you about that one) and moving in together?
It feels like a single guy in my age range that has his life together is pretty much a unicorn.
And so, dating after divorce? Sounds like a great idea. I’d love to date, but I’m also not about to lower my standards merely so I can be part of a couple.
Looks like I’ll be busting out the single gal shirt for my half marathon next month…(Emily….you’ve been warned!).
[Insert joke about DM sliding here]